So plan A failed to get me into some sort of more normal state. In fact, it went awful wrong on a lot of different levels. I haven't felt as depressed and shitty in long time due to that change up. Now I'm onto plan B and after days in, I feel about the same before I switched in the first place. I still a need to climb up the walls at times and I'm starting to wonder if anything could even help.
I guess it's a little early to say such but changing up meds has always sucked for me. It's been fine but it's still not where I want to be. Maybe it's just not in the cards for me. Maybe I'll always be that socially awkward kid and never get better. It just pisses me of because that leads to not wanting to leave, wanting to do things I can't and it just brings me down.
Anyway, just thoughts and rants. Just wish I could fast forward to a time when all things were ok. If not, just figure this shit out myself. That seems to be the case of what's going to have to happen. Ugh. Now I'm seeing to fight between distraction and a million thoughts a minute. I guess that is probably half the speed than normal though.
Pass me a bottle Mr. Jones...
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